2 down, 2 to go.

next paper, System Analysis. loads of theory stuffs to remember and common sensical stuffs too. wouldn't be a problem to pass, but scoring for that paper is the tough one. well, wouldn't be over confident, but still would be a little more relaxed when studying this module.

the last hurdle would be my LAN paper. amazingly, i need 40 marks to pass and i seriously still don't understand why. thank God i still have thursday and friday to study for my LAN paper and i seriously need intensive brain cell transplant for the next few days.

i guess i'm going through a period of testings, again. after great easter celebrations and renewed passion, comes the testings. raw faith is just being tested repeatingly, physically and mentally drained out and no matter how long you sleep, you just can't get the energy level back. no matter how much you plead for the presence of God, you still feel drained.

never felt so useless when i was doing my PCS paper earlier. the questions were almost similar as the ones i practised, yet i still fumbled. the paper was tricky and i wasn't confident enough for the module. the moment i handed up my paper, i thought to myself that i never would want to touch that module, again.

through all these difficult times, i had to pump myself with positive thoughts. i kept my cool and tried not to think too much negative stuffs. but sometimes it just gets into my mind and pollutes my mind with negative things.

even expressing myself now is difficult because i do not even know what exactly is my emotions. i feel tired, sleepy and empty. its not because i didn't sleep much, not because i played basketball earlier and certainly not because of a setback in my life.

but i do know something for sure, and that is to keep walking forward, keep pressing on, towards the light at the end of the tunnel. it maybe far, it maybe tiring, but i know that i WILL reach the end and i shall soar like the eagles in the skies.

my character is definitely being moulded and i would be moulded to who He wants me to be. areas of my life that isn't submitted to God has to be submitted now and sins that have yet to be forgiven is to be repented now.

being dependant on Jesus is great. all i need is Him and i know that He would never forsake me and He loves me because He died on the cross for us. He's always here with me, His Spirit dwells in me and i will abide in His words.

He's not just any human being, but He's God who will never let me go. He's the one that picked me up when i fell and He's also the one walking beside me in the shadow of dry bones. He's my protector, my savior and my Lord.

He's worthy of all praises and His blood covers all sin and shame. because of Him, we're able to have a relationship with our Heavenly Father and spend eternity with Him.

He who's in me is greater then he who's in the world.