whats wrong with me!?

paper today wasn't that bad, doable.

i wonder if my brain is processing anything today. nothing seems to be getting into my brain, but many seems to be getting out. my brain seems empty now and i do not even know whats in my mind.

studied for tomorrow's paper after my exams and nothing much was processed. really couldn't concentrate and the longer i stared at the paper, the stupider i felt. when i started to work out the solutions, it wasn't that difficult. but i still had to refer here and there=/

i just can't seem to channel all my focus on something.

there i was, seated in the library, trying very hard to study and my mind keeps wandering away or getting into sleep mode. it was really frustrating, yet i was emotionless.

my friend said that i'm just too tired and i should get some sleep. so i went home at 4, after "studying" for 4 hours and slept till 9.

lets not talk about that anymore.

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my friends, hamzah and jackson, are on the verge of quitting school. maybe not so much for hamzah, but jackson seems rather determined that he would sacked by the school by this semester.

the reason? because he seems rather assured that he would fail a module that he failed last year. the reason causing that? could be the lecturers, could be themselves, i've no idea. but to think of it, getting sacked after failing a module that you failed before is rather stupid.

once a student feels that there isn't any hope, would he even study for the paper? i believe not. if you're pursuing something and there's a ray of hope, you give your best shot and pray hard that it hits the bullseye.

but when hope casts a dark shadow, would you even bother about it!?

the worst thing is that, the lecturers actually told them that they would be sacked if they fail again. what a way to encourage students!! its almost like asking them to die since they are down with cancer.

not all cancer are treatable, but at least there's treatment to delay it!

so i saw jackson today, seated a few rows away from me, sleeping throughout the paper and handing up an empty piece of paper. WHY!? because of his great lecturer, telling him that he failed the module and no matter what results he get, he still fails.

what a good lecturer, so nice of him to encourage his student this way. i heard of the way he handles his students. the lecturer would mess up their programming codes and expect them to type it all out from stratch.

that's like madness!? i wouldn't even be able to do that!!

firstly, there's a reason why programming projects are usually given 2 weeks time to complete.

secondly, doesn't mean that when you complete your project, you remember every single line of the codes you typed.

lastly, if you're expecting a student to type out the codes from stratch, why bother to even get them to complete it? might as well just skip the project and head straight for the testing part!

thank God i've a nice lecturer but i'm really sad for my friends.

crapness.